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Wednesday, May 13, 2015

Is it weird to not be flying?

"I wonder if it's weird for the eagles to not be able to fly." says my friend to me, standing in front of the eagle cage at the zoo. "They are used to flying, and then one day they just can't." (or something like that. I should have written down her exact words.)

You can see in the picture that the top eagle's wing is cut short.

Her words struck me funny. I normally write for the spouses of addicts, so my brain went straight to that subject.

The eagles at this zoo were hurt in the wild, and then they each had to have a wing amputated. Their cage doesn't have a ceiling, just walls. Because they'd never be able to escape through the top.

Some spouses of addicts feel like this. Like suddenly they've had their wing cut off and now they're grounded. Where before they felt like they were flying, now they can only look up at the sky and dream.

Boy does that sound cheesy. But it's true. Lucky for spouses, they are unlike the eagle in that they haven't actually had a wing cut off. Their ability to heal and get back to a life of metaphorically flying is still very realistic. Of course it depends on a lot of things, and healing is not easy. And obviously different hurts and different wounds can or can't heal differently.

But, thankfully, you haven't lost your wings. They are still very much there.

I may not be able to control if others ground themselves. And it is easier said than done, but I for one will not be kept like an eagle at the zoo.

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