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Monday, January 11, 2016

I wish I had stood up for the importance of friendship

When I found out about my loved one's addiction I didn't know how to hang out with or even just message friends anymore. I didn't feel like I could talk about the things going on in my life. I didn't want to tell them about that loved one moving out of the house. I didn't want to tell them about the situation that was taking up all of my family's time, money, and energy. I was tired, and I didn't want to talk about the thing that was consuming all of our lives.

And even before I found out about the addiction, my loved one had told me that we didn't need friends. And lets just say that hanging out with friends was not smiled upon.

It is called isolation. And there are reasons that people, many times addicts, would want you to feel isolated.

But, looking back now, I wish that I had stood up for the importance of friendship.

Because friendship is important, too.

Even if you aren't able to hang out with friends as often as you'd like (because, lets face it, life is crazy and busy), it might be helpful to drop them a small "How's it going?" message once in a while. You don't have to spend a ton of time together to keep up a friendship.

At one point, while talking to one of my friends about some of what I was going through, she got this look on her face and then divulged that she was going through a similar thing.

Oh how sad that we could have both pulled from that friendship, yet there we were, both holding in our trials and keeping it to ourselves.

Keep your friends close.                      

(Note: I am really bad at suddenly realizing that it has been years since I have talked to a friend. Years pass quickly, and that's life. So, if you are a friend of mine, maybe take the initiative and send me a letter. :) )


  1. Hi, friend! :) I'm glad you were able to call me those years ago. I've never really felt like I know how to be a good friend because I tend to feel awkward about things (like worrying if I'm bothering people and forgetting to reach out), but I appreciated the opportunity to be a listening ear, even though I didn't feel like I could do anything to help. Isolation is hard, and I'm sorry.

    1. Hi friend! I think everyone feels like it is awkward to reach out. I know I feel that way all the time for all sorts of reasons. You are a great friend, and I miss our time together!!!